Baked Brownies

As things go, I’m pretty open to my daughters’ school’s efforts to fundraise. My problem is with one faction within the school. Its membership is top-heavy with loud, needy, emotional girls and parents fueled by unlimited stores of estrogen. Yeah, the Girl Scouts can bite me.

As if I don’t have enough shit to do. Now I’m going to harass my family, friends, and complete strangers to buy the 150 boxes of crank my kids are required to sell. What the consigliere failed to mention, is that each troop only earns a few cents on each box. The remaining money goes to the national headquarters and the cookie maker. But, I was assured my daughters are better off because of this activity. They’ll grow their goal-setting skills, learn how to make better decisions, effectively manage money, build relationships, and foster a sense of business savvy.

Damn straight they learned business savvy. They accomplished one of the most difficult transactions in real estate. They effectively gained an easement from a competing drug business. They’ll just be a little older before they understand why collaborating with certain businesses can be genius. Until then, if they ask me why we put up a table outside a dispensary, I’ll just say, “Fugget about it.”